Life at The Sequoias Portola Valley: A Community That Asks “Tell Me More”

The first time Mike and Suzanne ever saw The Sequoias Portola Valley, they weren’t visiting it. They were simply biking past. It was nearly 50 years ago. They admired the trees, the quiet hillside, and the open space, never imagining that one day it would become home.

“You never think you’re going to get that old,” Mike laughed.

Decades later, in their seventies, they realized it might actually be the exact right place. And now, two years after settling in, Mike says the most unexpected part of community living has been the connection.

There are no long elevator rides or isolated hallways at The Sequoias Portola Valley. Instead, there’s movement—everywhere. Residents cross paths constantly: on walkways, in the dining room, in the library, on their way to Windy Hill, or simply going about their day.

“I’m seeing 50 or 80 or 100 people every day,” said Mike. “The topology of our campus encourages relational interaction.”

And each interaction brings an opening to go deeper.

“You stop talking about yourself and ask the question: ‘Tell me more.’”

“Tell me more,” I inquire.

For Mike, those three words create the intimacy that makes community living feel meaningful.

Mike isn’t drawn to small talk, especially not now.

“Most people here don’t talk about what they have done. They talk about who they are.”

Much of that comes from the “life groups” he participates in:

• A men’s group, where big questions, honesty, and vulnerability create bonds.
  “For men, you have to ask a big question,” said Mike. “It changes the room.”
• A couples group, where spouses talk candidly about aging, memory, and the realities of growing older together.
• An intergenerational group, made up of families in their 30s and 40s raising young children without nearby grandparents.
  “We become sort of the mentors… godparents… babysitters.”

None of these circles is a formal program. They are organic, built from shared life, proximity, and a willingness to show up.

“These are the things we use as tools to stay fresh, to give back, to share, and create vulnerability, trust, and respect for others,” explains Mike.

Not all friendships start with intention. Some arrive by chance—like a rainy morning on Windy Hill.

Mike and Susanna were participating in a Sequoia Living photo shoot, doing their best to stay positive as the rain kept coming down. The photographers, Jon and O’Malley, encouraged them, laughed with them, and kept the session light.

Months later, the couple have become two of their closest friends.

“We are living life together,” Mike said. “We’re going to have Thanksgiving with them up in Lake Tahoe. And that was all because of that photoshoot.”

Moments like this happen often at The Sequoias, not because they are structured, but because life on campus invites connection.

Service has always been part of Mike and Susanna’s life. They spent 10 years working in the Democratic Republic of Congo, and when they discovered other residents with similar experiences, friendships formed quickly.

But community also means witnessing—and supporting—each other through the realities of aging. Mike shared a story about a neighbor transitioning to assisted living. He was struggling until a nurse sat down and told him:

“Accept it. Stop the bitterness, accept it. You have a lot of life to live.”

The moment reminded Mike of the marathon sign he saw in New York. Another version of the same truth: life is still unfolding.

“As long as we can accept where we are, then life will be rich,” Mike said.

Throughout our conversation, Mike returned to a philosophy that shapes how he lives:

“Life is an individual sport played in a team environment.”

At The Sequoias Portola Valley, that team shows up everywhere: in aerobics classes (about 30 women and him), in supportive conversations in the dining room, and in everyday neighborly interactions.

“You pick your teammates,” Mike said. “And here, we’re all teammates.”

Mike never wants to stop moving forward with acceptance, positivity, and purpose.
The following words guide the way he lives each day:

• “Today is not that day.”
• “As long as we can accept where we are, then life will be rich.”
• “Life is an individual sport played in a team environment.”

Community living at The Sequoias Portola Valley gives Mike and Susanna the environment, connection, and daily touchpoints to keep living with that spirit; fully, honestly, and together.

Because at The Sequoias, they aren’t growing older alone. They’re growing older in community.